XOS Watch Group

XOS Watch Group

Postby koimaster » March 5th 2019, 9:36am

Getcha sum renatoes and xo and watchstars!


https://xoswatch.myshopify.com/?fbclid= ... o2u22L7UJk


A eview by the phatcat of a renatoe automatic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bbe-46X ... _MW4eaM5wE
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby conjurer » March 5th 2019, 9:43am

It's amazing that this shit still clings to life, like Keith Richards--only nowhere as entertaining.
Cream rises to the top while jackoffs only leave puddles of rancid jizz.


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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby JAS1125 » March 5th 2019, 1:44pm

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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby Hawk » March 5th 2019, 5:00pm

It's the horological equivalent of somebody selling a fleet of NOS Trabants.

Trabants, like XOSkels, are rare and for much the same reason - nobody wanted them.
And the fact I'm still living rent free in his head makes me grin and giggle.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby tiktok » March 5th 2019, 5:24pm

I would kill for a Trabant.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby TemerityB » March 5th 2019, 8:40pm

I will not click that link unless someone tells me the website is rife with photos of a jeans-clad Avi Viera in some sort of excited state while clutching some sort of XOSkeleton POS.
I bought a dive watch from them that literally had “dive” in the name. The instructions said not to dive with it - it was only meant to LOOK like a dive watch. It was also fast by more that a minute per day. Garbage. Never again. - IWG buyer on Reddit
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby conjurer » March 5th 2019, 9:18pm

TemerityB wrote:I will not click that link unless someone tells me the website is rife with photos of a jeans-clad Avi Viera in some sort of excited state while clutching some sort of XOSkeleton POS.


Errr, yeah, yeah, sure, T. There's even a couple of vids of Avi pole dancing with Daniel Green. Go ahead and click away, just keep some Jergins and tissues ready, because there's gonna be some baby batter blowing in the Bronx.
Cream rises to the top while jackoffs only leave puddles of rancid jizz.


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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby tiktok » March 5th 2019, 10:15pm

Damn that's a long shot coming all the way across the water from The Queens.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby conjurer » March 5th 2019, 11:01pm

Interestingly--I mean, apart from T shooting off like Peter North over some Avi pics--this is where all TeeVee horology ends. I recall Tim Temple selling this XO shit way back, on the old ShopAtHome shows; he'd prattle on about XO using the same sort of stainless steel as Rolex, and he place the wartchs dial down on a table and spin them around, claiming this proved their perfect balance on the wrist, and all sorts of weird shit. I also recall that XO was one of the first of the Florida Wartche Triangle brands to incorporate a tourbillon movement. As Mr. Hawk points out above, nobody wanted to buy them because, well, they looked fucking stupid, they were oversized, vulgar, and rancid.

As bad as Renatoes were, XOs were a quantum leap of fucking bad. While Renatoes gave hardons to very old Chinese gentlemen and ballers, and made Oprah lubricate like a pallet of Kendall motor oil being tipped over at a Farm & Fleet, XO made nobody hot and bothered. No matter how much Temple spun this wartche, it wasn't moving, because even the feebs--well, most feebs--couldn't be bothered with this shit. It was a Corum Bridge too far, or more exactly, the Sturhling Original knockoff of a Corum Bridge.

So this is where the remainders end up, on a website so awful that nobody would dare to buy anything off of it. A final fucking hurrah for TeeVee wartchs that nobody wanted when they were new, and certainly don't want now that they're NOS--meaning New Old Shit.

There is no value to this shit. It's simply that, shit. If you had a bowel movement from Napoleon just before he died, would somebody want it? Would you put it in a shadow box and show it to your guests, saying, in a meaningful, subdued voice, "This--this--is the last BM of Napoleon, before dying on St. Helena." What would your guests think? Here's what they'd think--my host is showing me a box full of dried shit. And I can't wait for dinner. And, these cocktails really fucking suck.

So, no matter how it's spun--sometimes literally-- no matter how many fake diamonds are on them, no matter how big the grift, TeeVee wartchs end up like this; dried up shit in a fucking box.
Cream rises to the top while jackoffs only leave puddles of rancid jizz.


--Temerity, regarding Bazinga!.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby MKTheVintageBloke » March 6th 2019, 3:35am

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo Papa Hotel Alpha Tango Charlie Alpha Tango India November Tango Hotel Echo Echo Alpha Romeo, Whisky India Tango Hotel Golf Romeo Echo Alpha Tango Victor India Golf Oscar Romeo.
His deepest need was that people should like him. An admirable trait, that... In a spaniel, or a whore.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby TemerityB » March 6th 2019, 8:45am

conjurer wrote:Interestingly--I mean, apart from T shooting off like Peter North over some Avi pics--this is where all TeeVee horology ends. I recall Tim Temple selling this XO shit way back, on the old ShopAtHome shows; he'd prattle on about XO using the same sort of stainless steel as Rolex, and he place the wartchs dial down on a table and spin them around, claiming this proved their perfect balance on the wrist, and all sorts of weird shit. I also recall that XO was one of the first of the Florida Wartche Triangle brands to incorporate a tourbillon movement. As Mr. Hawk points out above, nobody wanted to buy them because, well, they looked fucking stupid, they were oversized, vulgar, and rancid.

As bad as Renatoes were, XOs were a quantum leap of fucking bad. While Renatoes gave hardons to very old Chinese gentlemen and ballers, and made Oprah lubricate like a pallet of Kendall motor oil being tipped over at a Farm & Fleet, XO made nobody hot and bothered. No matter how much Temple spun this wartche, it wasn't moving, because even the feebs--well, most feebs--couldn't be bothered with this shit. It was a Corum Bridge too far, or more exactly, the Sturhling Original knockoff of a Corum Bridge.

So this is where the remainders end up, on a website so awful that nobody would dare to buy anything off of it. A final fucking hurrah for TeeVee wartchs that nobody wanted when they were new, and certainly don't want now that they're NOS--meaning New Old Shit.

There is no value to this shit. It's simply that, shit. If you had a bowel movement from Napoleon just before he died, would somebody want it? Would you put it in a shadow box and show it to your guests, saying, in a meaningful, subdued voice, "This--this--is the last BM of Napoleon, before dying on St. Helena." What would your guests think? Here's what they'd think--my host is showing me a box full of dried shit. And I can't wait for dinner. And, these cocktails really fucking suck.

So, no matter how it's spun--sometimes literally-- no matter how many fake diamonds are on them, no matter how big the grift, TeeVee wartchs end up like this; dried up shit in a fucking box.


Perfect.

As an aside: The missus loves Renato, and I can't make her stop. She owns two old women's models, though I must admit they're not as garish and ginormous as the men's watches. However, she also likes Michele, the poor woman's Hublot, and I can't make her stop that, either.
I bought a dive watch from them that literally had “dive” in the name. The instructions said not to dive with it - it was only meant to LOOK like a dive watch. It was also fast by more that a minute per day. Garbage. Never again. - IWG buyer on Reddit
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby kevco » March 6th 2019, 9:29am

I owe several Renato's. They are what they are, and I like them. But I take them for what the are.
Now XO...I just don't get it.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby BigCheez » March 6th 2019, 11:29am

TemerityB wrote:
conjurer wrote:Interestingly--I mean, apart from T shooting off like Peter North over some Avi pics--this is where all TeeVee horology ends. I recall Tim Temple selling this XO shit way back, on the old ShopAtHome shows; he'd prattle on about XO using the same sort of stainless steel as Rolex, and he place the wartchs dial down on a table and spin them around, claiming this proved their perfect balance on the wrist, and all sorts of weird shit. I also recall that XO was one of the first of the Florida Wartche Triangle brands to incorporate a tourbillon movement. As Mr. Hawk points out above, nobody wanted to buy them because, well, they looked fucking stupid, they were oversized, vulgar, and rancid.

As bad as Renatoes were, XOs were a quantum leap of fucking bad. While Renatoes gave hardons to very old Chinese gentlemen and ballers, and made Oprah lubricate like a pallet of Kendall motor oil being tipped over at a Farm & Fleet, XO made nobody hot and bothered. No matter how much Temple spun this wartche, it wasn't moving, because even the feebs--well, most feebs--couldn't be bothered with this shit. It was a Corum Bridge too far, or more exactly, the Sturhling Original knockoff of a Corum Bridge.

So this is where the remainders end up, on a website so awful that nobody would dare to buy anything off of it. A final fucking hurrah for TeeVee wartchs that nobody wanted when they were new, and certainly don't want now that they're NOS--meaning New Old Shit.

There is no value to this shit. It's simply that, shit. If you had a bowel movement from Napoleon just before he died, would somebody want it? Would you put it in a shadow box and show it to your guests, saying, in a meaningful, subdued voice, "This--this--is the last BM of Napoleon, before dying on St. Helena." What would your guests think? Here's what they'd think--my host is showing me a box full of dried shit. And I can't wait for dinner. And, these cocktails really fucking suck.

So, no matter how it's spun--sometimes literally-- no matter how many fake diamonds are on them, no matter how big the grift, TeeVee wartchs end up like this; dried up shit in a fucking box.


Perfect.

As an aside: The missus loves Renato, and I can't make her stop. She owns two old women's models, though I must admit they're not as garish and ginormous as the men's watches. However, she also likes Michele, the poor woman's Hublot, and I can't make her stop that, either.


If you ignore the outright lies and breach of promises concerning “limited editions”, the weird diamond scam and the whole Rothstein debacle, you’re left with probably the best TV wartche. At least as far as styling and construction. I wouldn’t worry about trying to convince the wife to dump them, if she’s like mine, it’s just another fashion bauble.
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Re: XOS Watch Group

Postby Hawk » March 6th 2019, 11:49am

kevco wrote:I owe several Renato's. They are what they are, and I like them. But I take them for what the are.
Now XO...I just don't get it.


XO Skel: a Trabant with fender flares and a spoiler the size of a barn door.
And the fact I'm still living rent free in his head makes me grin and giggle.
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