Murphy, Ignoring Me

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Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby conjurer » May 21st 2015, 10:04am

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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby Kahuna74 » May 21st 2015, 10:32am

Mittens does this to me, but if I start to ignore her she will start knocking things off the table right in front of me, and then give me this look. I get the biggest kick out of it. I never thought I could love a cat as much as I do. She pisses my wife off at night; She sleeps in between the two of us. I get a kick out of that too. Beautiful cat John.
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby 3Flushes » May 21st 2015, 1:40pm

Kahuna74 wrote:Mittens does this to me, but if I start to ignore her she will start knocking things off the table right in front of me, and then give me this look. I get the biggest kick out of it. I never thought I could love a cat as much as I do. She pisses my wife off at night; She sleeps in between the two of us. I get a kick out of that too. Beautiful cat John.


I had a feral cat that a chick made me take home from a picnic in Griffith Park. The day we found him, he'd pulled his scrawny, stinky, matted down, flea bitten ass onto the bench of a picnic table where he was trying to drag off a porterhouse steak that was five times his weight. He could barely budge the damn thing, it was pitiful. When I tried to retrieve my dinner, he stood his ground, hissed, scratched the shit out of me, and having drawn first blood, I was about to send him flying, when Melanie (the chick), screamed "you leave him alone you bastard!!!!!", as she scooped him up in her arms. I figured she was dead meat, however, the little prick was as smart as he was weak; he started licking her hand and her face, stretched out in her arms, and purred like a , purred like a well tuned- purred like a manipulative SOB that I was taking home, that's what. He was black and white and had half of a mustache on his face, so Melanie named him Stasche.

Me and Stasche fought over territory for his entire life; I moved a chair once, and he crapped on the spot where it had been until I started spraying some disgusting smelling garbage there that the vet gave me; frankly, the cat shit was preferable. Stasche would hide behind drapes or bed skirts and nail my feet as I went by, he made bathing him a living hell, frequently quit eating his food until I changed it, pounced all over people from the back of my couch or charis etc. My vet used to laugh his ass off. He felt that somewhere in Stache's bloodline was an immature female cat that mated with an immature bobcat or the like as he was built like a wedge; short front legs and very long back legs. That damn cat went from 0 to 60 MPH in 2.6 seconds, had a vertical leap of about 12 feet, and he'd land so softly, nothing on or in the target shelf or furniture even rattled. He weighed in at 14 pounds as an adult and was svelte. I was in grad school and had a desk in front of a window where he liked to sun. It was always covered in piles of papers, books, a typewriter, weed and a few assorted delivery vehicles- your basic school shit. If I was working and ignoring him, or there wasn't sufficient laying out space, he would wedge himself into a crack between a couple of piles and then slowly start stretching out, stop and look to see how close my crap was to the edge, smirk at me, and continue the deal until he'd knocked enough crap off of the table to make himself comfortable.

The relationship with 'ol Melanie lasted for two blowjobs and a movie, (about four more days as I recall); I wound up having that nut-job cat for 18 years and have never loved an animal so much in my life. (Other than the cat I had as a kid). Still can't get another one- been 9 or so years and I'm thinking about heading out to a shelter and rescuing a couple of old cats (8 yrs. +) that are on a fast-track to be euthanized, but I don't know - I'm typing this through watery eyes.
Last edited by 3Flushes on May 21st 2015, 2:11pm, edited 4 times in total.
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby biglove » May 21st 2015, 1:49pm

The last pic is my favorite. You are getting The full on "fluffy butt" treatment.

It is obvious that the cat cannot be bothered with allowing its human servant the glory of gazing upon its face.

Damnit, Flushes. You made me get watery eyes.
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby Bigjimzlll » May 21st 2015, 5:16pm

I have no idea how I end up with cats. My wife had the homeliest cat when we met. BooBoo was his name. He was 1 year old when we met. He had saber tooth tiger fangs. He was on deaths door dozens of times. I had even dug holes 3 times. He left us last month. 19 years old. Deaf, missing one fang....but still purring.
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby Kahuna74 » May 21st 2015, 6:02pm

3Flushes wrote:
Kahuna74 wrote:Mittens does this to me, but if I start to ignore her she will start knocking things off the table right in front of me, and then give me this look. I get the biggest kick out of it. I never thought I could love a cat as much as I do. She pisses my wife off at night; She sleeps in between the two of us. I get a kick out of that too. Beautiful cat John.


I had a feral cat that a chick made me take home from a picnic in Griffith Park. The day we found him, he'd pulled his scrawny, stinky, matted down, flea bitten ass onto the bench of a picnic table where he was trying to drag off a porterhouse steak that was five times his weight. He could barely budge the damn thing, it was pitiful. When I tried to retrieve my dinner, he stood his ground, hissed, scratched the shit out of me, and having drawn first blood, I was about to send him flying, when Melanie (the chick), screamed "you leave him alone you bastard!!!!!", as she scooped him up in her arms. I figured she was dead meat, however, the little prick was as smart as he was weak; he started licking her hand and her face, stretched out in her arms, and purred like a , purred like a well tuned- purred like a manipulative SOB that I was taking home, that's what. He was black and white and had half of a mustache on his face, so Melanie named him Stasche.

Me and Stasche fought over territory for his entire life; I moved a chair once, and he crapped on the spot where it had been until I started spraying some disgusting smelling garbage there that the vet gave me; frankly, the cat shit was preferable. Stasche would hide behind drapes or bed skirts and nail my feet as I went by, he made bathing him a living hell, frequently quit eating his food until I changed it, pounced all over people from the back of my couch or charis etc. My vet used to laugh his ass off. He felt that somewhere in Stache's bloodline was an immature female cat that mated with an immature bobcat or the like as he was built like a wedge; short front legs and very long back legs. That damn cat went from 0 to 60 MPH in 2.6 seconds, had a vertical leap of about 12 feet, and he'd land so softly, nothing on or in the target shelf or furniture even rattled. He weighed in at 14 pounds as an adult and was svelte. I was in grad school and had a desk in front of a window where he liked to sun. It was always covered in piles of papers, books, a typewriter, weed and a few assorted delivery vehicles- your basic school shit. If I was working and ignoring him, or there wasn't sufficient laying out space, he would wedge himself into a crack between a couple of piles and then slowly start stretching out, stop and look to see how close my crap was to the edge, smirk at me, and continue the deal until he'd knocked enough crap off of the table to make himself comfortable.

The relationship with 'ol Melanie lasted for two blowjobs and a movie, (about four more days as I recall); I wound up having that nut-job cat for 18 years and have never loved an animal so much in my life. (Other than the cat I had as a kid). Still can't get another one- been 9 or so years and I'm thinking about heading out to a shelter and rescuing a couple of old cats (8 yrs. +) that are on a fast-track to be euthanized, but I don't know - I'm typing this through watery eyes.

Wow Flushes, this is fucking beautiful and right on the money.
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby hcharles » May 21st 2015, 8:58pm

You must have cut Murphy off from his drug of choice, catnip.
Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby conjurer » May 21st 2015, 11:18pm

Thanks, gentlemen. Murphy is our "special" cat. He's remarkably dumb, absurdly cute, and has cost us a mint. You might see in the pics that his tail looks a little goofy--this was due to a fight he got into with another cat who fucked him up pretty good. He must have realized that he was in over his head and decided to retreat like the Iraqi army, but waited a second or two too long. He got into another fight earlier and got bit up pretty good as well.

After our white trash neighbor dumped him and moved away (also leaving his bros, Smokey and O'Brian) Murphy wandered around our house and sprayed literally everything his furry ass could reach.

Nice stories, 3 and Jim!
Jim...you are a ray of sunshine here.

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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby Mortuus » May 22nd 2015, 3:16am

All very good stuff, and I'm typing this through leaking eyes, as well...they give us so very much, and ask only for our love (and a lot of food, toys and vet bills) in return. Our current "K9 daughter," Daffodil, is such a joy -- and has been for four years -- that I can't even contemplate a life without her. She's the center of our universe and spoiled rotten...and that's as it should be. Well, most of the time, anyhow. :roll:
Okay, so I was wrong... http://thewatchforum.net/forum/index.php ...but I was never so glad to be incorrect... ;)
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby TemerityB » May 22nd 2015, 9:45pm

conj, considering Murphy's lack of interest - I insist you call Confuse-A-Cat!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2Je1CEPkUM[/youtube]
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby Hawkeye » September 18th 2015, 9:22pm

lol they are always doing that to me,when mine aren't whining about more food
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Re: Murphy, Ignoring Me

Postby biglove » September 19th 2015, 5:44am

For those who haven't seen it, "Sad Cat Diary."

http://youtu.be/PKffm2uI4dk
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